I’d treat this the way I treat prayer at family gatherings – I’ll be silent but keep my eyes open and look around during the prayer – and I’ve found that there are often others doing the same thing.

I agree that the prayer isn’t a great thing to do, but the downside seems pretty big – do you really want to be the guy who ruined the company party?

My advice is to either just be silent during the prayer or not to attend but make an excuse why you couldn’t attend. If you want to make a stink, think about how much you like your job and how easy it would be to get another one.

Posted: December 13th 2010

See all questions answered by Eric_PK

Based on your information, if I was you (and I am not, you got to decide what is best for yourself), I would not go to the party. If asked why, I would say seeing that a prayer was clearly scheduled, how could, I, an atheist, attend such a function? I would also say that such a set-up is rude and theocratic, and I want no part in it. I would then describe the wonderful party I am planning to go where the secular nature of Christmas is a given. You could suggest this solution to the others who are also uncomfortable.

Let word of mouth do your work for you. Such ignorant and arrogant designers of the party with their overweening sense of religious privilege deserve no direct consideration on your part.

Posted: December 12th 2010

See all questions answered by logicel

It’s really hard to answer that without knowing more about the company you work for. Is it a company that welcomes employee input and sometimes acts on it? Is it a company that is overtly religious in other ways than this? Is it a company where dissent is tolerated? How big is the company – is it small enough for the voices of 'several’ people to count, or are you a drop in the ocean?

One thing I have learned – the hard way, I’m afraid – is that it can be dangerous to become a spokesperson for other disgruntled people: they have a tendency to melt away once you’ve stuck your own neck out, and you can end up being labelled a troublemaker.

Unless the other people who are uncomfortable with the idea are willing to be openly associated with any protest about it, or unless you are confident enough of your relationship with management to feel able to express yourself openly on the subject (but you’re not, otherwise you wouldn’t have put the question), I would exercise some caution, I think. I would suggest that, if it’s just a single prayer once a year, it’s not a huge deal and therefore not worth risking your job or your prospects over.

If there is a genuine opportunity to express your concern, do so by all means; but otherwise I think I would simply refuse to participate, or even pretend to participate, in the prayer. I wouldn’t sabotage it by refusing to be silent during it, but I wouldn’t join in and I wouldn’t bow my head or adopt any other prayer-associated posture. If anyone asked me about it afterwards, I would give my reasons. It’s a low-risk way of objecting, and if there are enough of you who do it, it’s likely to be noticed, without getting you into hot water.

Posted: December 11th 2010

See all questions answered by Paula Kirby

You could use a pledge based service like The Point to set up an anonymous pledge. The way this works is that when a predetermined number of people have (anonymously) agreed to (for instance) sign a letter to the management expressing concern about the Christmas prayer, then the identities of the participants are revealed and the agreed upon action goes ahead.

If there are not enough participants who sign up before the deadline, then their anonymity is maintained, and the action doesn’t go ahead.

It’s a way of minimising risk to individuals, who would like to express their views but who would prefer to do so as part of a larger group.

Posted: December 11th 2010

See all questions answered by bitbutter