I have been unable to find any solid evidence whether lying to kids regarding Santa Claus has any negative or positive effects. Apparently, some think it is no problem and others think it is.

However, we do know some generalities about lying:

Adults often engage in a special kind of lying to children. Lying about the existence of Santa Claus or fairies is a socially-accepted form of engaging the children in sentimental fantasy. Fantasy can be entertainment, including a lovingly sentimental fantasy like Santa Claus. Although fantasy is unreality, it needn’t be a lie if it is not treated seriously. But these rituals do run the risk of undermining credibility with the children if too much effort is made to counter doubts in their questioning minds. Sheltering children from the harsh realities of life may not be a good way of educating them.”

I think the parents that I have encountered that get furious with others spilling the beans regarding the Santa myth are most likely creating problems with their kids regarding credibility (especially those who emphasize that the kids must be good, defined by the parents, like practicing an hated musical instrument or eating an despised food, in order for Santa to visit), while others who regard it as an enjoyable game with their kids do not cause any detriment.

My concern is why Santa Claus? It is so popular, I just don’t like doing what others do I guess. As for having fun and using imagination, parents can do that without lying to their kids, for example, shared special moments in nature or reading stories can be just as wonderful. I remember how rich my childhood was in those terms, like my older sister encouraged by our mother setting up a bazaar tent made out of old sheets on her bed, and giving away her comics if we guess what she was thinking. Very magical, very wonderful, and no obvious fabrication.

Posted: May 8th 2011

See all questions answered by logicel

Mythical creatures are fun, especially for children.

When they figure out, for themselves, that Santa and The Easter Bunny aren’t real, they learn several important lessons, including not automatically accepting proclamations from authorities (like parents).

The “lying to your kids” argument falls apart unless you’re willing to constantly badger your kids about every fictional character they watch or read about. They have brains. Trust them to figure some things out for themselves.

Posted: May 7th 2011

See all questions answered by Dave Hitt

If you value (for instance) recreating the 'magical’ feeling your parents created by deceiving you about Santa Claus highly enough, then it does make sense to lie to children about this character.

But if your primary goal is to encourage a person in your care to trust you, and to develop confidence in their capacity for critical thought, deliberately lying to this person about the existence of mythical creatures isn’t a good idea, in my view.

Posted: May 7th 2011

See all questions answered by bitbutter